The difference? My JNMom’s behavior was part of a pattern of controlling her kids while failing to protect them from All I need Today Is A Little bit Of Stitch And A Whole Lot Of Jesus Shirt; she was always painting herself as the angry victim and as a result wound up weaponizing her kids versus her husband or extended family. On the other hand, my MIL was trying to keep her kids safe in some frankly less than ideal situations, and has consistently kept her kids away from what family drama she could manage. My JNMom still doesn’t get what on earth she’s done wrong. My MIL has the emotional maturity to apologize, and has learned to back off on being overbearing on her now adult kids and her growing up grandkids.
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